Of Roads and Insight

I think being a Kenyan is very entertaining. Minding my own business listening to the radio on my way to work this morning, I started laughing so hard that other road users were puzzled. And no it was Kingangi & Maina. It was the news.

To give this news segment some background: you all know about the numerous road expansion projects that are underway in the country. You've probably also heard the way a bunch of investor/landowners on Mombasa Road, lead by the Standard Group, are crying foul claiming that the proposed expansion of the road into their property was nothing more than a ploy to frustrate them reading mischief from the government. Their complaint may sound a little far fetched but consider the amounts of money they must have sank into their investments, only for the government to belatedly come and say "nice building and all, but we want that land"!

Anyhoo, what had me in stitches was the comment by Orengo the Lands Mininster. Apparently, according to him, there was indeed some mischief because these guys own large pieces of land and yet chose to construct on the very edge that's nearest the road! According to him, they were the authors of their own misfortune and in fact had been trying to set up the government to look bad.

I hope that one day when the earth has been reduced to smitherins by annoyed Mother Nature and all of humanity wiped out, the intelligent life form that will scavage through the reckage will not come upon that pearl of wisdom and gauge the human intelligence therefrom.

Have a sharp day!!!

The Unstoppable Rush

I'm on leave (yeah don't you wish you were me) so I spent my evening watching the movie "Unstopabble". I must say that it's been a mighty long time since I watched a movie that kept me on the edge of my seat. It's just something else!

Speaking in very broad terms, the movie's about a runnaway train loaded with diesel and highly flamable chemicals that hurtles forth at great speed. The question on everyone's mind is how to stop it and avert the iminent disaster. Enter (the ever good looking) Denzel & Chris Pine; two guys who happen to be there at the right time with an idea. Can it possibly work?

Unfortunately, there is a downside. For all the great acting, there are some characters who should never have been given their parts. Either that or there were some flaws in the script. The perfect example is the kid playing Pine's son. He shows absolutely zero emotion throughout the whole movie save for the absolute end. He is not surprised that his dad's on tele, doesn't wonder why there's a mad rush, isn't startled by the speeding train ... Something wrong here? Why not just used a cardboard cut out? Then there are Denzel's daughters. Instead of being concerned about their dad's well being, they seem to be cheering him to pull stunts that no man of his age (or yours) can pull. Not normal.

Other than that, it's a really great film that I would encourage all to see.

Of Seeing and the Point

So the good news is I have 20:20 vision. My eyes are great! The bad news is I have great eyes with 20:20 vision. Indulge me as I explain:

I recently noticed that I have great trouble driving at night. The glares from the other cars going in the opposite direction make me slow down to a crawl as I wait for them to pass. (And if you’re the wise guy who drives with full lights, I do hope that you make enough money to buy your own private island where that’s OK …) I figured that short of tinting my windshield, which I learnt was against the law, I have the option of getting spects that would not only sort out the lights by night they’d also help me deal with the sun by day. Great! I happily went to the optician who told me that they had just what I was looking for, complete with the local or imported variety depending on the depth of my pocket.

“Oh, I have insurance,” I said in a very self assured tone. I thank God that I have very few medical needs so I don’t often make use of my employer’s medical cover.

“You do?” the attendant asked seeming a little concerned. “Who is your insurer?”

“Company X,” I say beginning to get bored with the conversation and eager to try on the exciting looking frames.

“Ah,” he says in a deflated tone.

“What’s the problem?” I ask, my interest reignited.

“Well, you see, X will only pay for the lenses if you have a prescription. We did the eye test and your eyes are fine, so you’d need to consider alternative means of footing the bill.” He explained. I could tell that this was an explanation he’d given out many times before.

What annoys me is the fact that if I keep driving as I am, I will either ruin my eyes (at which point the insurance will gladly step in) or cause a grisly accident costing the insurer so much more. Is that reasoning not flawed? Am I the only one that sees a problem?

So here I am forced to fork out money for what my employer has ideally already paid for. Great!

Have a fair January!

The Close of 2010

Belated season's greetings & wishing you the best in 2011.

I for one cannot tell you how happy I am to see the end of December. Explanation: my pal, a winter bunny, was around after having been out of the country for more than a decade. We took it upon ourselves to show her the Nairobi night life. Heh! Kenyans can really party! We did the bend-overs the Jazzes (Tuesday & Sunday) the Kidums (though he was a no show) and just about everything else save Monday Reggea as we did need a day of rest. I got home on many a 6am's and can now confidently say I'm too old for this shit (refer to one of the episodes of How I Met Your Mother - season 4).

My short term (and perhaps circumstantial) resolution for the new year is not to spend a shilling on alcohol in January ...